The human ball

Was working overtime late at night on tuesday and needed some food, so I went to the nearest gasstation to get a burger. Went to the teller, looked to my left and saw an old cupple. They both looked 75-ish, the lady had a nice little head, normal body, evenly porpotioned legs and all. The guy though; he was pretty small most all over, you know, like old people that have shrunk a bit, although his jacket was huge! Not only was it huge, it looked really round in every direction. It was such that he could shoplift one of those big plastic balls you can jump around on, and noone would notice! What made me look twice was his head - it was just unbelievely small! And because his jacket was so big his neck was just an inch too small for his head to stick out of it! He loocked like one of the characters from "Kalle Klovn", the deliveryguy if I remember correctly, just with no neck.

I had to wait with my order because I was on the werge of bursting - afterwards I damned myself for being too polite to take a picture of them for your viewing pleasure.. Gonna stick around there to see if he shows up again!

Zzzz..

Apparently I snore. I'we heard it before but I guess I have dismissed it on a subconcious level or something. Nothing compared to my father tho, he snores so loudly the whole house trembles. Maybe it's that compared to him I don't really make much noise.
My father doesn't sneeze a lot, but when he does it says in the paper the next day!

Read about a armwatch that gives you a small shock whenever you snore. Seems cruel to me, can't imagine who would wear it freely. And it doesn't even show the time.

Summertime

Tonight we loose one hour of sleep, remember to set your watch one hour forward. I have never really understood this concept - seems like a design flaw to me.. I may not be as confused as Karl Pilkington tho, he has on several occations given pretty interesting theories on what should be done with the whole concept of time when, if, we move to another planet, as he thinks the elderly would become pretty grumpy if we adjust it to suit the planet's orbital movements.

Morning pill

Hi, I'm not dead, just been a busy week. Doing some work to reach deadline monday, we'll see how it goes.. Planning on watching Smokey and the Bandit tonight, too tired to go out. I got all 3 movies a while back, toghether with Cannonball Run that me and Liv watched two weeks ago, good times!

But that's not why you called.. Check out this alarm clock - it has got to be the coolest one I'we ever seen! Reminds me of a 3D demo we made for a multimedia project at school.

Skiing in Sweden

Going skiing for the first time in years in Sweden this weekend, I’m gonna try snowboard for the first time. If you don’t hear anything from me in a while, call the ambulance :-S

Busted product photo contest

Busted product photo contest

Video game music

Check out this compilation of different remakes of theme music from our favorite video games (Written in Norwegian, the music speaks for itself). I love this stuff, the first Mario video was really good, aswell as the Monkey Island bit. Oh the memories.. I actually still have and old hand-made poster from when Press Play on Tape played at The Gathering in 2000 or so :-)

Update: Found this Mario-thingie too.

Local Celebrity Part II

Annette found this small teaser in the paper this morning:


I especially like how then almost got my name right, and how it looks like a cat scratched my chin in the print ;-)

Bread crumbs

In my kitchen I have like a closet/shelve where I keep my bread. I can not remember the last time I ate a whole bread, usually more than half og it goes to waste (I don’t eat breakfast). So when it gets hard or even when it sometimes grows molds I throw it out. The other day as I was cleaning I noticed that a lot of bread crumbs (damn you english seperation of words!) had gathered in the closet – I can’t have cleaned it out more than a handfull of times ever. It got me thinking, if a big piece of bread can grow mold, and crumbs aparently not, what’s the minimum size it can be and still get moldy – or to put it the other way; can you make really small bread that is mold-resistant? Just buy a bunch of them and never worry?

More Ricky Gervais Show

As Erik pointed out a clip of Ricky’s apperance on David Letterman Show can be found here. Another Karl Pilkington fan site has this feature:

Blast from the past, Scientology, cones and more..

What I like about the internet is all the weird stuff that’s out there and all the crazy people who can ramble on uncensured. You just have to dig a bit. Or just stay here. I remember reading about a crazy maths professor, Alexander Abian, many years ago who, among other things, claimed all bad things on this planet were caused by the moon and that if we could just blow it up everything would be nice and dandy.

This got picked up by Kibo (James Parry) who besides writing loads of nonsense formed his own religion, as I remember it, as a parody on the Church of Scientology (you know, the thing with Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and John Travolta where they brainwash you and steal all your money and other nice things). Kibo eats Chuck Norris facts for breakfast. He sparked my facination for cones, and can be blamed for why I keep stealing cones when I’m drunk.

Both Kibo and Scientology are days worth of entertaining reading if you have a taste for the weird. Also the Rotten Library is good reading, for instance the “origin” of many of Karl’s stories about intelligent monkeys. I wouldn’t step out of the library tho.. See how similar Karl’s head is to this supposed picture of Ollie?!

Ricky Gervais on Letterman

My two favorite comedians at the moment were gathered this Friday 3rd of March on a issue of Late Show with David Letterman. It aired in the US the same night, and I’ll be shure to download it or catch it on Norwegian TV (on monday I guess?). Dave knows who Karl is, how cool is that!

Doctors

Went to the doctors today before lunch. I had just changed doctor so I didn’t know who I was visiting except for a name. Found the name on a map downstairs at the clinic and went to the 4th floor and had a seat. I all seemed strange, there were patients coming in and out, but there were no doctors running around and there was nobody at the reception and in one end of the hall I could see lots of weights and exercise bikes. 20 minutes after my appointment should have started I finally asked an old man sitting beside me what was going on. It turned out this floor was for physical training and such, I guess people recovering from car crashes and that and I was in the wrong floor. When I got to the right floor I was too late to have my appointment and there would be no openings untill next friday. I asked about the sign downstairs and they said they hadn’t got around to update it. What’s the point in having signs and maps if they are out of date?

Bored?

Here is an old piece that has been floating around the internet for a while, but I think its so funny I have to repost it. I think I read this is a swedish delegate in the European Parlament or something. This guy is soo bored, it’s probably friday after lunch, he’s going to a party later that night and he just can’t wait to leave. I really sympathize with him, I must have done just as stupid things when boredom has been at it’s worst..

The forklift

We were eating lunch at work the other day, there was a big panorama window and I spotted a forklift pottering passed at no more than 10 km/h with at least 6-7 cars following it just waiting to pass. I collapsed laughing, everyone else looking bewildered at me. I guess my weird sense of humour origin to when we lived in Kent, England. I must have been between 3 and 5 when, and this is one of my first memories at all, dad took me out to see The Jungle Book, the old Disney cartoon classic. We got in the wrong room and saw Ghost Busters I. My dad was loving it, for 12 years and up it was a comedy, I was hugging my chair in terror wondering what the hell a comedy was!?

The Mortality Sequence

Albeight my short 25-or-so-years of age, I have smelled the inevitable stench of death a few times, none of them as comical and possibly less serious as about half a year ago; I was at the office, my coffee was running empty and cold, so I thought I'd go and have a refill. On my way I passed the toilets and thought I might do the old two-in-one. So I drank the last of the coffee and went into the closest stalls - what met me was just the worst toilet-hell o' stench you can imagine, so I instinctively closed my nose that was my only source of oxygene, as my mouth was full of half-warm office-grade coffee.. As reason had left and instinct had kicked in my mind could not decide which was worse - take in stinking ass-air through my nose, having to smell it; or smallow the worst thinkable collection of coffee before getting the life-precious O? I woke up at the floor of the toilet floor with a bump in my head.

The title is a reference to Pink Floyd, an early instrumental version of Great Gig in the Sky.

Guinness World Records

When I was younger the cooles think I knew was the Guinness World Book of Records, there was so many facinating facts and pictures there. Now, 10 - 15 years later I suddenly remembered it and got it ordered a few weeks ago. Oh man, I read in it almost every day, I go through all the weird and unprobable facts and not the least I tell everybody I meet about it!

I think what I like best about it now is not the actual numbers and records, it's more the people behind, their lives, their sacrifices and their motivations. A few examples:

I think my favorite is the guy who eats metal. He has eaten 15 shopping carts, 18 bikes (like 10 would'nt be impressive enought). 7 TV's, 2 beds, a computer and a Cessna small aeroplane. The first thought that struck me was that I would never invite him home! Just imagine coming back to the livingroom with coffee: "Heeeeey, where is the sofa!?" *burp*.

One of my newest facts is the guy who was been struck by lightning 7 times! The best thing is that they say he died in 1994 by a broken heart.. Sounds really romantic and all, but think; who would date a guy who keeps getting struck my lightning!? You should never go on pickninc with him by a tree on a large plain field, the only safe date would be on a drive-in cinema, or maybe on a tandem bike.

I kinda also bought the book to see what the old classics where up to; the tallest lady, the two fat twins who rode really small motorcycles and of course the guy with the longest fingernails. He must have really dedicated his life to this, spending so many years of his life just to have the longest fingernails in the world. And I can understand why someone would dedicate their selves to be the fastest swimmer, the one to collect the most buttons etc, but this guy didn't really do anything, he is in the book because he didn't bother to cut his fingernails for a while! As Stephen points out, why sacrifice so much? Imagine his mates calling him up: "Wanna go bowling, Jeff?" "No, I can't.. I have this thing going on..". Is he married? What kind of intimate life can he have, for god's sake, can he even go to the toilet unassisted?

All for now, there is so much cool stuff in this book, I'll be shure to keep posting when I find more!

Stavanger for Africa

I love music DVD's and in my collection I think my overall favorite has to be Live Aid from 1985, just for the sheer volume of great musical history. There is so much great stuff there: Queen and Freddie Mercury's unparalleled performance, later attempted copied by Robbie Williams in 2005's Live 8; of course "Do they know it's christmas" and "We are the world"; Duran Duran who choose to play none of their best tunes; Madonna; Sting; Dire Straits; Nik Kershaw I could go on and on..

Now, there is a real gem for our Norwegian listeners hidden there if you have the patience to look - on CD 4, Extras there is a track called "Overseas Contributors" that contains various parallel conserts from all over the world, Western-Germany, Russia and so on. It is all in one track, so you can't skip, but if you keep going for a while you hit something that I like to call "Stavanger for Africa". It's just beautiful! Filmed in Stavanger, with lots of local B-lists. Per-Inge Torkelsen does a hilarious apperance with his big old glasses, Mia Gundersen is there (I always thought she looked like the female version of the sidekick from Airwolf Ernest Borgnine), and many others. Just the thought of Stavanger really pulling toghether to save Africa makes the hairs in my neck stand..

Why this piece of Norwegian musical goodness has been forgotten is beyond me!

Skidskolan

Skal på en liten alpintur til sverige snart og sjekket http://www.hemavan.nu/ for å se på mulighetene for å ta et snowboardkurs etc. Fikk litt kalde føtter da vi så navnene på de forskjellige nivåene/kurse :

• Fjällbusar, 3->
• Smygare, 4-9 år
• Glidare, 4-9 år
• Svängare, 5-12 år
• Grupplektioner

også en liten frekkas til slutt:

• Fräsare, 5-12 år

Her er det bare å la fantasien løpe fritt!

Plastick bag for that?

Was at the shop earlier tonight. I only bought a roll of large garbage bags. When I had payed the girl behind the teller asked me: "Do you need a bag for that?"

Beat for Beat

Just a quick note that the Norwegian adoptation of “The Lyrics Board”, “Beat for Beat” is back on the screen this friday, March 3rd at 19:55! Been a long pause now, over 3 months, but I am really looking forward to seeing it again on a weekly basis! Too bad I can’t join the old gang at Luftslottet.

Big day tomorrow, I’ll keep you posted!

Shampoo

Just got reminded of once when I was studying. There is a shampoo brand in Norway called “Fruktis”, which in it self is a pretty weird name for a hair product. I picked up a new bottle of this and used it during the week. At the end of the week i noticed how greasy my hair was, eventhough I had washed it thoroughly. The weird thing was though, it was surprisingly shiny. I looked at the bottle and it turned out they have several different products in pretty similar bottles – I had been cleaning my hair with conditioner!

Dub Side of the Moon

Sveinar mentioned a raggae/dub cover of Pink Floyds classic Dark Side of the Moon, and the other day I got hold of it. I love DSotM, I love raggae and I love good covers, what more could I ask for!?

So fire up your pipe, check out Dub Side of the Moon for some samples and maybe you can find the album in a specialist music store, order it online or have a look at a BitTorrent-site. The

Great Gig in the Sky is my favorite from the original album and there is no difference here. Their next project is said to be a cover of OK Computer - hey, wait a sec, isn't that the name of my other blog? :D

Update: found some live stuff here.

Ya, man! Peace and love.

The Ricky Gervais Show

..has sold out! New episodes of RGW is no longer free download, as of tuesday all new episodes are avaiable for purchase. Ok, so not surprising, and to be honest I'm willing to pay a small fee to be able to listen to it, I think this is the best comedy I have heard since the glory days of The Simpsons. What annoys me tho is how it is distributed.

Option 1) Audible.com This is confusing, I have a bachelor's degree in computer science but I spent a while figuring how to actually start listening to it if I don't have an iPod. After about 15 click, advice from equally confused mates I found out you have to define some "device" or other just to get on to the downloading part. You can choose to listen streaming, this requires that you download a 500 KB codec (spyware-alert rising) to play it with Windows Media Player. Ok, well if I have to pay for this I would at least like to have the stuff downloaded on my machine. Option 2, download it; this requires you to download and install Audible's own proprietary "Music Manager". For starters, why would I want to have another media player, in addition to the 100 I already have to use just to be able to listen to the stuff I want to? I can barely stand having to use iTunes, which I think is the biggest piece of crap-software ever written on the face of the planet (I don't know what kind of software they make beneath earth, so therefore the precaution), let alone have to switch between Windows Media Player and Winamp for different formats. And now I need this shit? I downloaded it, went thru green-hell as I installed it, and loaded it up only to find the episode was not yet available.

2) iTunes: I thought I'd try this today, just to get a message "Purchase of this item is not currently available" eventhough the show is aledgebly "number one in the UK iTunes download chart"..

So they have some issues, that's not my greatest concern - I listen to RGS almost everyday as I walk to work, the shop etc on my phone. There is no legal way I can do this with any of the solutions available, eventhough I have payed for it! If I use iTunes I will have to manually copy the files with me to be able to listen to it on any of the 3 computers I use on a daily basis.

On a more general note it is interesting how the old drug-marketing strategy has been successfull here - the show would never been remotely as successfull if it had been a pay and DRM'd option only from the start, good on them!