Add it up

I have at least two nice bright shirts that have been ruined by stains of red wine. At the same time it is not crazy to estimate there has been spilled red wine in my apartement at least as many times. Those times I have resolved the problem by cleaning up the mess with a cloth. Here is the point: I have no cloths that are stained by red wine! What is going on? I am this close to querying Myth Busters to see if a shirt made up of cloth-material will actually sustain and fully recover from a spill of the dark, liquidized grape!

After running the story by a few friends, a co-worker and S's sister both claimed drenching a unfortunate shirt in white wine would be the solution. I love this kind of cartoon-logic! Nothing has made me laugh more than this in a long time - this is Karl Pilkington-material! It's like "what's the opposite of red wine .. white wine!". So what would rosé wine do - only partially clean it? This is a theory you would find scribbled in a diary of a madman, next to drawings of women with knives in their faces, found on the corpse after he commited suicide trying to hold up a stamp-collectors shop just after it changed ownership with a travel agency!